And so this is Christmas

The beloved xmas post.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanza, Akemashite Omedetou Gozaimasu, Happy New Year and most importantly Happy Holidays.

Be Safe and Warm and Careful during this awesome season.

To my Japan friends- It was great seeing you at the xmas party (you all looked fabulous-fabulously drunk that is) hope seminar park was useful.

To my Ohio friends- See you soon. Beware of terrible English speaking skills and weird Japanese quirks that will come out at inopportune times. If I bow at you, just bow back and pretend it never happened.

To my friends in other interesting places- Hope to meet you sometime soon.

Sitting Seiza

At a traditional tea ceremony with my fellow teachers.

First 5 minutes- People get to their positions and kneel down. I look around and see everyone is sitting seiza. I can do this. Piece of cake. 10 minute mark- People are still content around me. I am soooo Japanese. No worries. But the sensei is still talking about the cereomony and not performing it. 15 minute mark- First sign of pain. Start to think how much longer this will go on. Sweets are being passed out. Tea is being prepared. 20 minute mark- Pain is now unbearable. People are starting to look uncomfortable. Can't wait until I drink my tea because then this is OVER. 30 minute mark- The guy next to me starts to squirm. I start to squirm. I can't take the pain. I ask the guy next to me how long is the longest he has sat seiza, he said 1 hour 30 minutes. I am amazed, there is NO WAY on this Earth that I would be able to do it for that long. 40 minute mark- The last few people have had their tea. My legs have that numb cold then hot feeling. I can't decide whether to overlap my feet or keep them parallel. I am starting to sweat. But the end is in view. 50 minute mark- We are still sitting here. I feel like I am going to vomit or pass out. I saw stars. The guy next to me keeps hunching over and making crying sounds. The guy on my other side tickles my feet, I don't feel it. The kocho sensei gets poured another cup of tea. We are starting the ceremony all over again. 60 minute mark- I lean over to get some blood to my toes. I am impressed that I have lasted a whole hour. I usually only last 5 minutes. The end is in view. One of the teachers stands up and actually falls over while trying to walk. He is unable to walk to the door with out making a mockery of himself so he resumes his seiza seat. 1 hour and 20 minutes later- FINALLY we are able to stand up. I am afraid. I attempt it once and it is almost more painful to stand than remain sitting in seiza. My ankles are permanently bent into a pointed toe. If I bend my ankles I am afraid they will break like brittle ice. Finally I get to my feet. I can't walk normal. I shuffle my feet to walk down the hall. Climbing stairs brings tears to my eyes. I try to shake off the pain. The rest of the day my legs were sore. NEVER AGAIN.

This blog is dedicated to Sean Ellsworth who sits seiza often and for long periods of time while he is training to learn tea ceremony.

December has come

So it's December. Turn on the damn heaters!

My lungs are fully prepared to be filled with kerosene if my fingers and toes get to be warm!